St. Enodoc Golf Club - The Newport Cultural Exchange

The Newport Cultural Exchange

Members of St Enodoc will be relieved to hear that a contingent of their golfers returned safely from a recent International Tour to Wales. Their leader, a former Captain, who regularly claims to be the most popular Captain of the Club in the post war (Afghan?) period, had established some connections in this vicinity. A team from Newport had visited St Enodoc under the guidance of Lord Rock, Mike Samuel, who generously invited a group back to “The Land of my Fathers”

The campaign began inauspiciously in a garden centre off the M5, where the group breakfasted, resplendent in their black club sweaters. One of these golfers was particularly fascinated by comparing the cost of lupins with his local supplier. Clearly unenthusiastic about the outcome of his research he turned his attention to the charms of the checkout girl. We believe that a proposal of marriage took place judging by his bending to one knee and the obvious embarrassment of the young lady who was anxious to move the queue along. She was not seduced by a promise of a timeshare in Delabole.

Arriving in South Wales the weather was not welcoming but our hosts at St Pierre were most gracious. The course was in fine condition but possessed that one quality which baffles our men – trees. The home side won comfortably. A measure of the challenge was that they set the nearest the pin prize on their famous 18th hole. Only one player reached the green.

A disturbing feature of the evening meal was that many of our hosts were ex captains and they were wearing bright red jackets embroidered with elaborate badges and gold leaf lettering. Our next Captain, David Elliott, was eyeing these with some interest. Perhaps there will be a proposal in the future for this particular wardrobe malfunction to transfer to St Enodoc. If this should happen members are encouraged not to greet him with “Hi di hi!”

This is probably illegal in Cornwall but OK in Wales......

Eventually the golf resumed and the travellers noted with interest and dismay that there were even more trees. The rain stayed away and the match unfolded with little surprise in the result. The home Captain noted with surprise that one of his playing partners seemed particularly interested in lupins. Much singing followed after the meal where the Welsh were impressively enthusiastic. However Rex Molloy and Tony Rounsevell responded with several Cornish classics.
Everybody was appreciative of the time and energy that Kenton Williams had brought to the excursion. It was noted that the number of e-mails that he had generated suggested that he should now be known as “Spam”. Clearly Steve Smith might have benefitted from reading some of them and then he might have known how long he was going to be away from his wife. She was “surprised” to learn that it was a three day trip.