One of the Early Birds had wished he had stayed in bed the other Saturday as the whole morning proved to be a chapter of disasters. The former police driver from Bodmin has recently joined the Mounted Cavalry Division having acquired a buggy so that he can continue playing after surgery to replace worn out joints from too much footy as a youngster. The problems of the day began at the 10th as he incurred a 2 shot penalty for hitting said vehicle with an errant shot (for completeness sake the penalty is now actually only 1 shot) . That was not the end of the penalties as on the 17th green he managed to hit the Enforcer\'s ball, so reducing his already dreadful low score.
With the round over he might have thought his troubles were at an end but oh no as into the shower he goes and promptly lathers himself with what he though was his shower gel. There were shouts of horror followed by a naked body emerging at some speed glistening from head to toe like a performer in a porn film (so Niblick was told by the more worldly wise). “Where are my glasses” he shouts ”I think I have just used the sun screen not the shower gel”. Once bodily order was restored the final indignity of the day was receiving the dreaded Wooden Spoon, so beloved of Captain Bob, for the worst score of the day in the Early Birds. Better luck next week!